As we all know, diets don’t work. And by “diet” I don’t mean a vegan diet, or Paleo diet, where the word “diet” is used to describe our customary food and drink. I mean the kind of diet where we temporarily restrict what we eat in order to lose weight. Time and time again, studies have proven that 95% of dieters regain their lost weight within one to five years.
What does this have to do with a our manifesting process? A lot! Because for a lot of us, manifesting new results looks an awful lot like going on a “diet.”
Let’s say, for example, that we are trying to up-level our business. We buckle down and tell ourselves that, for the next six weeks or even six months, we’re going to work hard, invest even more of our time, get stuff done that we really don’t enjoy doing … all for the sake of the result we want.
We might do the same thing when we’re trying to manifest a promotion at work. We tell ourselves that we just need to make this one big project a success, that putting in long hours and working weekends for a few months will all be worth it in the end.
Even if we’re working on our relationship, we may put aside our beloved pajamas / wine / Netflix habit in order to spend more quality time with our partner in the hopes that we will reclaim connection and intimacy.
Whenever we approach a new manifesting project, we have to remember the energetic reason for why diets CAN’T possibly work:
Temporary restriction cannot produce permanent expansion.
Energetically, there’s no way that choosing deprivation can create a result of abundance. Nor can something “temporary” that we impose on ourselves create a “permanent” new result. Neither the Universe nor karma works that way!
Deep down, we know this. That’s why, all too often, we let ourselves the hook within just a few days of our “diet” … whether we’re on an actual diet, or working on our relationship or family life or career. It’s not a matter of discipline. When we’re in a state of self-imposed deprivation or restriction, we intuitively know the result won’t be what we hoped for. And so we just … stop.
But what’s the solution here? Diets don’t work … but some people DO change their lives and weight permanently! So what is the secret?
In order to achieve lasting transformation, we need to do things DIFFERENTLY rather than giving something up. The only way we can transform our lives is by making a commitment to new choices that are sustainable in the long term.
Sounds great, right? But here’s what we must acknowledge.
If we’re going to change our lifestyle – whether it’s our diet or career or family dynamic or relationship – we do have to give up the old one. And the first three to four weeks WILL suck. Not because we’re in a state of deprivation, but because change is uncomfortable.
We may not like our old results … but we’re getting SOME sort of satisfaction or pay-off out of our old choices, or we wouldn’t be making them. Just like we KNOW that binge eating gummy bears isn’t good for us, just like constantly micro-managing our children isn’t good for us or them … we know we’re doing it for the short-term, feel-good payoff that we crave.
So where do we start?
First, we must examine our current choices. Keeping food diaries and looking up the nutritional value of what we’re eating can translate beautifully into taking stock of our daily choices and interactions and how they contribute to our current results. We must, after all, start where we are!
But then comes the hard part. Because we can’t just cram new, “good-for-us” choices onto our already full plate, just like it makes no sense to eat a ton of broccoli along with a bag of gummy bears.
We’re going to have to give up what isn’t working. Permanently.
THIS, by the way, is why diets remain so popular, even though we all know they don’t work! We love short-term “fixes” for our health career, relationship, or business! Because then, giving up what isn’t working is something we only have to do temporarily. Two months without gummy bears? Okay, no problem! We can do that! A lifetime without gummy bears? Suddenly, we’re not so enthusiastic.
Similarly, we may be willing to let our kids to their laundry and handle their chores the way THEY want for a week or two … but give up control permanently? Forever?? Gulp! Suddenly, we feel immensely threatened.
But there’s no way around it. You’re going to have to give up who you are, right now, if you’re going to create new and permanent results. You have to become someone different, someone new who is a vibrational match for new results.
That means you have to want your new results SO MUCH that you’re willing to give up what you currently enjoy. Because some part of you (yes, it could be a somewhat dysfunctional, twisty or weird part of you!) IS enjoying the current choices you are making. Or you wouldn’t be making them.
So … what are the “gummy bear” choices that you would have to give up in order to create more abundant results?
And what do your “broccoli” choices look like? You know … the healthy and productive stuff you are not currently doing?
Here’s the good news. There’s a million recipes for broccoli. Yes, at first you may only like broccoli with a little bit of cheese. And bacon. (Personally, I think bacon is proof that God loves us.) And while that’s not ideal, it’s still better than having gummy bears for dinner. Eventually, you’ll discover your own unique, preferred way of making broccoli, and you will love it! But you still have to give up your gummy bears. Forever.
There’s no way around it.
So take a look at your every day choices that contribute to the results you want to change.
- Which of your choices are actually nutritious and nurturing and creating a real ROI?
- What choices are your little “treats” that give you quick, feel-good gratification but ultimately don’t contribute to the result you want?
- What choices do you “binge” on that totally derail or even un-do your efforts?
- What triggers those “binges?”
Any successful manifesting process IS a permanent lifestyle change. Unless, of course, you want to engage in the manifesting equivalent of endless yo-yo dieting.
What if you really, really don’t want to give up your “gummy bear” choices? Honestly … let yourself off the hook for now. Because you can’t “make yourself” want to permanently give up gummy bears. At best, you can talk yourself into temporary self-imposed deprivation. Next thing you know, you’re on another manifesting “diet.” Sometimes we just don’t want a result badly enough. Until we do.
What new results do you want badly enough that you’re willing to find your most delicious “broccoli” choices?
To your abundance,