How to deal with annoying people

Posted on April 4, 2007
Filed Under Embrace Your Highest Path and Purpose, Soul Realignment, Spiritual Development |

We all encounter them - at work, at the grocery store, in the middle of rush hour, and in restaurants. Sometimes even the people we love and live with can be annoying.

Let us first of all define what “annoying” is. To me, it is an intrusion into our thoughts. We are happily pursuing our life, and then someone does something that we perceive as rude, or thoughtless, or just plain wrong. Next thing we know, we can’t stop thinking about this incident. We go through it in our minds, how we could have reacted, what we should have said, what the next encounter might be like, and how we will react should it ever happen again. The incident disproportionately preoccupies our thoughts. This, to me, is annoying.

I was last annoyed by a personal trainer at my gym, who took it upon himself to give me unsolicited advice. Not only was it bad advice, he also interrupted my workout - twice. I don’t really care about the workout that much. But my time at the gym is my time to think, to connect with myself, and to practice self-care. Having that time intruded upon is, well, annoying.

Let’s take the first step in dealing with annoying people. And that is to recognize that being annoying is not their issue. Being annoyed is ours. We can’t change people. We may try, but it’s an uphill battle at best, and it is usually a waste of time and energy. We can, however, change our reaction to them. And so the first thing we must do is take ownership of our reaction. That personal trainer was undoubtedly trying to be helpful. The fact that I found him intrusive and annoying is my issue, not his. So don’t blame the guy that cut you off in traffic this morning. Don’t blame the girl at the coffee counter for screwing up your order. Don’t blame your co-worker for talking loudly on his cell phone right outside your office. Take ownership of your annoyance.

Once you’ve taken ownership of your negative reaction, there’s a very simple way to stop your mind from dwelling on the annoying incident. Send the person who annoyed you a blessing. Yes, that’s right. Bless the personal trainer, the guy who cut you off in traffic, the coffee girl, and the loud co-worker. It doesn’t have to be elaborate or lengthy. A blessing is simply a transmission of positive energy towards another person.

As we send a blessing, we transmute the negative energy we are experiencing into a positive increase of awareness. By sending a blessing, we acknowledge all the times we ourselves have been the annoying ones. Through this very simple practice, you will find that your preoccupation with the annoying incident will evaporate.

Here’s a quick and easy blessing that you can apply to any situation:

“Creator of all Beings, Creator of all Beings, Creator of all Beings … I ask for a blessing of Divine Love and Light to be sent to (….). I am grateful to this person for increasing my level of consciousness and giving me the opportunity to send this blessing. In the highest good of all, thank you, thank you, thank you.”

And that’s all there is to it. Sending a blessing benefits not just the person being blessed. It allows us to connect back to the Divine Love and Light from which we were all created, and which connects us all in Unity.

In Love & Light,

Andrea