I went on vacation to Mexico recently, and bravely decided to leave my laptop behind. The plan was to sit on a beach and do nothing for five whole days. After all, I should be able to live without work, email, and social media for a while, right?Â
The first day of doing nothing was lovely. The second day was merely okay. By day three, I was beating myself up severely. Had I become a complete workaholic, that I was longing for my laptop so that I could write my next article, my next class, check in with my social media outlets? Did I truly not know how to let go and just have fun on my vacation?
By the end of the day, I was distressed. I have apparently created a horrible imbalance in my life, resulting in “all work†and an inability to simply play.Â
On day four, the light bulb went on!
My work is not “work†at all. First of all, teaching a teleclass is way more fun to me than drinking margaritas poolside. My work definitely doesn’t feel like “work.â€Â And it’s not what I “do†for a living. It’s who I AM, a joyful avenue of authentic self-expression! When I “work†I get to tap into my Divine gifts and align with my Soul’s purpose.
And here I was, beating myself up because “work†is apparently all I want to do!
Isn’t that crazy?
Why would we ever want to do anything BUT tap into our Divine gifts and align with our Soul’s purpose? After all, this is where we are at our most abundant. This is where we are most aligned to our true Divine nature!
And yet it seems we have an odd notion of “work/life balance†in our society that makes us believe that there can be too much of a good thing.
Why not heavily focus on what allows us to be exactly who we already are, to express our Divine gifts, to do what makes us feel joyful and fulfilled?
If we feel most abundant and Divine while working out at the gym … why not take this to the extreme? (And please know that there are ways to monetize any passion while you’re at it!)
If we feel most joyful and authentically self-expressed while spending time with our children – why insist on having a “balance†between family time and work, or time to ourselves?
If we are spirituality geeks, or obsessed with writing, or fixing up cars, or if we feel whole when we paint murals or make jewelry, or bake cookies … if these activities are how we perfectly express our Divinity, then why not spend as much time as we possibly can doing them?
Why insist on “balance†and doing something that, quite frankly, makes us feel far less than the Divine beings we truly are?
When we are engaged in the authentic expression of our Divine gifts – when we are flowing with the grace of who we already are! – that’s when we are most aligned with Divine Abundance.Â
After all, abundance cannot flow when we are inauthentic to who we truly are. Abundance cannot flow when we’re trying to fit in, when we’re compromising, sacrificing, or doing something out of obligation.
Are you giving up your abundance for the sake of “balance?â€Â Or will you joyfully give yourself permission to be one-sidedly abundant, to be extreme in your authentic self-expression, to do nothing but express your Divine gifts into this world?
I, for one, am giving myself permission to take my laptop on vacation with me from now on!
Blessings,
Andrea
{ 30 comments… read them below or add one }
Who I am and What I do continue to blur in a really amazing way… Less and less bouncing between extreme ends of what I’m trying to “balance” and more and more riding some center point that is All of it. The life I am creating and the career I am creating become increasingly the Same Thing… Don’t you wish someone could have prepared you for this truth as a child?
Andrea I just loved this article!!! You are amazing how you make your articles interesting and not so long, long and so informative. I like the get to the point and make sense and not so long that I lose interest. You are joy and a delight and thank you for what you do.
Raelene
Andrea, what a realization! It’s about your message of authenticity. We’ve given “balance” a strict definition that doesn’t fit our authenticity. What you describe here is true balance, being healthy and authentic to who we are. I love it!
I do take a day off a week. That day is a day where I don’t have to do errands and those things that “need” to get done but I’m not thrilled to do. My day off is doing whatever thrills me. Now, that’s balance!
Definitely agree. Doing/being in alignment is where its at. Being our soul’s purpose is doing what we love and we no longer have to separate out our “parts”—when we are in unity we are tapped into grace. Viva La Laptop!
—Bright Michelle
Andrea,
Interesting article and perspective. I find it a little difficult however and maybe it is because I didn’t read it well enough. The difficulty is not in that you have found a way to justify your “work” but that you didn’t find the ability to be with just yourself without having to connect to the external world. That is what we do when we meditate and that is also what challenges us in our meditation. Had you held out for a couple more days you may have found an even deeper reservoir of wisdom and perspective. I am not saying what you did discover is wrong or bad, I am just presenting the possibility that there is even more. I hope that makes sense to you. I admire your focus and your desire to help others. It speaks loudly about you and your heart. Next time you get a chance to spend a few days alone why not try being really alone with just yourself and see what you find. Healers, and I consider you one, are notorious for doing for others and not for themselves. We tend to neglect our real issues by focusing on what we can do for others and thereby never disconnecting so we can see and be with ourselves.
Thanks for this very insightful article. I did enjoy it and I do hope that you see my words as just that, words. An idea and nothing more.
Peace,
Andrea, I agree, being authentic, living your passion and being paid sharing your passion and Soul’s purpose are so delightful. I love your article and how you weave your message clearly through the points.
Hi Sue – Love that! I often take days of “doing nothing” … I’ve also found myself, though, telling myself I “should” do nothing on days that I had planned as days “off.” Ideally, I think, we go with what’s authentically in our hearts,just like you say!
Hi Michelle – Yup, the idea of no separation between our doing and being is beautiful, isn’t it? One flowing seamlessly into the other … aaah.
Hi Berney – Interesting comment. I would agree if my intent for the vacation had been to just be with myself and find deeper reservoirs of wisdom and perspective. However, the intent of the vacation was to relax and have fun, rather than disconnect entirely from the external. There are definitely times where I’ve gone on personal retreat … that’s a whole different energy and then any discomfort that arises from “not doing” is definitely a different issue.
Hi Slade – YES! I actually would settle gladly for someone having told me this even five years ago, LOL!
Loved reading this, Andrea. There’s much to be said about allowing your creativity to come into form when it is right there. It’s actually unbalancing to me to NOT write when the creative urge hits. That’s my kind of work, too. Creating is fun.
This is very refreshing, Andrea! The while work life balance thing innocuously pervades our lives. I see it as a form of homogenization. Even as children in school we are encouraged to be balanced and “well rounded”. We are schooled in what we are not “good” at to the detriment of what we ARE good at – what we love and what we are in alignment with!
We continue this philosophy and course in our lives throughout adulthood.
We can recognize that this doesn’t work for most people! Thanks for bringing this up!
Blessings,
Keena
Interesting! Reminds me of John Muir, the naturalist whom we can thank for many of our national parks, who said that when he goes outside, he actually goes in. I’ve been thinking about that observation and how it relates to serving others. Sometimes, going out and serving others IS going in–it is drawing on our deepest internal reservoir. When we serve others, we serve the greater Self, where we are all connected. And that’s fulfilling! For a lot of women that I see as a purpose coach, keeping that reservoir full is the key to true balance. If you know living out your purpose through connecting to others on your laptop is filling your reservoir, then I say hats off to that! Woohoo to that!!
Thoughtful words…it has taken me a long time to realise that yes, when I am in the flow magic happens and all the things I worry about – somehow or the other pall into insignificance and people somehow or the other appear to do the jobs i dont like and which zapp my energy. So definitely agree with all the sentiments expressed above. Berney, I love your point re meditation and going deeper within. Yoga encourages us to give ourselves space and permission to breathe and go with the flow. For me it is our level of consciousness and intent which predetermines just how deeply we allow ourselves to surrender and let go…I find myself in writing as well as in meditation..the two go hand in hand…without the meditation, inner connection with Self (we are all One) my creativity dwindles and health suffers. yes, its all about balance. peaceful blessings. Ntathu
Ok…I don’t mean to be negative, or perhaps I’m not quite getting it, but what about those of us who would LOVE to spend all our time doing nothing but expressing our Divine gifts into this world, however, we may have to spend 40 hours a week in jobs where we may not necessarily be able to authentically express ourselves and feel most abundant, but it is out of necessity that we do this in order to pay the mortgage, bills, school fees etc., etc., etc!
Hi Sue – I agree! Creating is SO much fun! And certainly a huge part of our Divine self-expression!!!
Keena – I was on a rant on that topic the other day! We do get schooled in “improving” ourselves in the areas where we don’t shine. I think being “well-rounded” stands in the way of being in our true brilliance! It took me until I was over the age of thirty to discover I was a good writer … but I sure knew from age 8 that I had no interest in math or sciences!
Personally, I’m going to encourage my daughter to be brilliant where she’s brilliant … and if she couldn’t care less about physics, it’s fine if she does just enough to get by.
Cynthia – Love this comment. Going out and going inwards … same thing, really. Honestly, I often joke that it’s easy being Buddha-like while sitting by ourselves on the couch. It’s when we go out and actually ENGAGE with people, we begin engaging with parts of ourselves that may go unacknowledged otherwise.
Lesley – No-one “has to” spend 40 hours a week in unfulfilling jobs!
That’s a perception! Life is too short NOT to start a business that is an authentic expression of your Divine gifts – and yes, this may take up nights and weekends at first. Transitioning from a day job to a purpose-based income requires time and effort. I’m not one to recommend just walking away from a steady income, that would be irresponsible. But self-employment is available to everyone! The transition can be tough, but it’s SOOOOOO worth it! I started this business when my daughter was two weeks old and I did everything during her naps, at night, and on weekends. Exhausting – yes. Worth it? Totally!!!
Hmmm…. very interesting comments. Thanks for the feedback Andrea.
Lesley, I dont’ know your situation, but I downsized my life so I could afford to live on the salary I earned working part-time at 24 hours/week. That freed up my energy to pursue what I really wanted to do. There are many ways to approach things. I hope you find one(s) that works really well for you!
I’m with you on this one. The same folks who invented work life balance also invented vacations and retirement. Who are they? Employers! Employers are out first for the organization and the well being of the individual is far down the list. When the line is blurred between work and play and all is purposeful life is without need of these distinctions.
Andrea and all,
I have recently started thinking about “both”, instead of “either/or” in certain situations; and it is very liberating to have the options in these situations. If you had taken your laptop with you, you could have had it available if you decided to use it. If you never touched it, that would have been fine too. The idea is too give yourself all the options available, and then be authentic by picking and choosing what to do, according to what feels right in the present moment.
Kevin, I love your idea about both. So cool!
Hmm… maybe you’re just too comfortable with what you do for work to step out of your own comfort zone to enjoy other things? You do enjoy doing other things besides that which makes you money, right?
If you payed for a trip to Mexico, live it up! If you can’t relax and have fun because your laptop isn’t around, while your on a beach relaxing and sipping a margarita in the sun than don’t you think that is a problem? Who wouldn’t enjoy that? lol
Shouldn’t you be able to enjoy your “divine self” in any situation that isn’t directly related to helping others or making an income?
Your work may be your destiny and what you love to do, but you should also be able to take a vacation away from it and enjoy your time without it, IMO.
Wow, Mark. That’s an awful lot of “shoulds” for a single comment. The whole point of my post is that we NOT “should” ourselves into working or not working …
Well it sounded to me as if you were “should”ing yourself into going back to work instead of enjoying your “divine self” in the moment while on vacation without your laptop handy.
Why else did you want to take a vacation? Something caused you to desire to take a vacation away from what you “love” to do, or else you wouldn’t of took 5 days off or felt like you needed too, right?
Not trying to come off rude or challenge your own perspective, just trying to understand it better.
Also..if people always did what they love to do don’t you think they would end up getting sick of it. I know when I go extreme and do what I really love all the time I end up having to take long breaks from it or it’s not as fun and the excitement and enjoyment dies quickly.
Actually, Mark, it was the opposite! I “shoulded” myself into taking a vacation without bringing my work along … when in reality, I love what I do!
Blessings,
Andrea
Hi I am deaf. Is there a better way to benefit from all you are sharing? Thank you for coming my way as you are reaching out to many others. God bless you! Thank you! Thank you! The clarity is beyond thanks! Smiling with joy~
This post shows me you have the lifestyle I want. You didn’t go on vacation so depleted, you had to sleep days away to get refreshed. You went on vacation full of life and wanting to do what you love!